The Dufrane Theory

Today, in front of the press, Martha Stewart triumphantly announced that she was back in the saddle. She's back to being CEO and HBIC. With a smile that portrayed the relief you can only get from being released from prison she was graceful and masterful. As she skated over the underlying theme of how she had just spent time in the big house she was able to shift the focus on the resurrection of her name and consequently her brand.

For this, quite a few of my female friends have applauded her. She has triumphed.

"She never belonged in there anyway," they'd comment.

"If she had a penis this would have never happened," they exclaimed.

Uh, bitch please.

Two things. Lets not get this twisted... she BROKE the law and (how should I put this...) she aint exactly a part of the typical "wrongly accused crowd". Now don't get me wrong, strong women often get the short end of the stick for being too strong... or even more apt... a bitch. She is a bitch only if that means she is a shrewd businesswoman. She is a bitch only if that means she goes in for the kill and demands her underlings to be as focused on her ideals as she. She is a bitch only if that means she goes after what she wants with the same intensity that has made Bill Gates and Donald Trump multimillionaires.

And while Donald, Bill, and another fav entrepreneur of mine: Magic Johnson get a bad wrap in some circles (real estate, geek and the black social conscience, respectively) as being relentless business pit bulls while a vast majority of this nation has gone against Queen Martha. Well... only if a vast majority means males.

Females, especially alpha females, especially white alpha females have rallied to defend Stewart as a saint. It's like she wasn't guilty of crime or even worth prosecuting. It's almost as if she didn't lie to the prosecutors and attempt to cover up a very public and obvious mistake. It's as if some male would have lied and not had to pay the fine or got jail time or gotten any probation. Not only is this not true... but the problem is Martha Stewart is the better for all of this!

You see.. first off, many of these same women have all forgotten about how they bemoaned the tragedy of OJ Simpson where they talked very badly about how justice didn't work, blah blah blah... and now all of a sudden they wanted a proven criminal to get off because she doesn't have the balls to be a man. See, not only did she commit a crime but then she lied about it which pissed off the US side of US v. Stewart and quite frankly you need to have your shit straight if you are going to get away with a federal crime. Ultimately, she fought (and then lied) to the law and shockingly... the law won.

But in the end, the greatness of my Dufrane Theory comes into play ... Martha gets out serving several months and paying probably one of the lowest white collar fines I have ever heard of and takes back the reins of her company. She becomes the new "Apprentice" mogul and she'll have effectively "crawled through 200 miles of (filth) and come clean out the other side". She went to the big house and came out looking like a star. Now, many of the Anti-Marthites will be satisfied with her time served. Others will be unable to get others to hate her because... well, she's on top despite going to jail and having to endure the life of a criminal.

I'll never pretend to dislike Martha. She's brilliant, tenacious, and she's a leader. She unfairly gets treated as a evil woman the same way Hillary Clinton and other strong women do.. especially if they don't bow down to men who would prefer they be self the centered asshole leaders. Still, should you do the crime... even rich, you might have to do the time. Lets never lose focus on that. Fame can be a double edge sword. If we fail to prosecute and sometimes make examples out of famous people (even if they're our heros) with criminal intent we lose the right to peruse the common man in the same vigor. When that right is lost, the power of law & order is severely diminished and eventually our society will crumble. And THAT would be the real crime.